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Listen up college kids, Andrea Peyser is PISSED.

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GET OFF YOUR PHONE! You're missing out on the quintessential college experience. Who is this Andrea, you might ask? Excellent question, but to be honest we’re not really sure. Andrea Peyser is apparently some sort of New York Post columnist who wrote a book called Celebutards and hates gay people. Really, celebutards? Is that even a word?

In addition to fearing the LGBT community, the liberal-hating “sex cheerleader,” according to Gawker, now worries that college students at Columbia University aren’t getting enough. And by “getting enough,” we mean gettin’ some.

Peyser, who apparently likes to walk around the Morningside Heights campus stalking her prey, was shocked to find many of the students completely ignoring strangers. Why? Their smart phones, of course! It appears that instead of looking around, they look down, passing potential bed fellows by in favor of a world where talking is not necessary, and apparently, neither is sex. Shame.

While we hate her morals, she does have a point. Are people so into their phones today that they can’t spot a hottie across the quad and skip class just to talk to them? It’s how we survived the winters!

Apparently, other students feel she has a valid point about this discovery as well. Resident advisors have launched “The Social Experiment,” a scavenger hunt (OMG! Love it.) type game where people walk around campus with passwords. We’re hoping the passwords are words like “G-spot” and “uncut” but we doubt it. Too far? Maybe, but we don’t care. It’s college, baby!

This is an amazing idea for all resident advisors to try, so pay attention!

As people walk around with passwords, students must go up to strangers and ask if they have one. If they do, the student gets a password (yay!). If not, the student potentially makes a friend… or more (yay!). It’s a win-win, people.

The person with the most password wins $500! Not such a bad deal for people who can handle putting their phone down.

While Peyser’s worry about the lack of sexual activity on campus is valid (and one that we share), this is where our opinions split. She believes this plan could lead to problems. Why? Because someone else told her so.

“First of all, there’s the obvious flaw that befriending someone because of financial incentives is basically the same as marrying an old, rich guy so you can cash in when he snuffs it,” says Eve Binder, a senior at Yale and blogger for Ivy Gate. She also claims the game was created by “obviously Prozac-addled” advisers. Uhhhhh, some one clearly can’t handle meeting new people. Either that, or they can’t live five seconds without their smart phone. Eve, dear, it’s not all about you.

Plus, girl’s gotta eat, you know?

Some students at Columbia say the pressure to do well at school has led to the lack in social energy. Maybe this is true, but how do we fix it? Surely, some scavenger hunt won’t make students realize how much they’re missing.

Take Emma, for example. When asked what she thought about the program she said, “I think what they’re trying to fix is something that is not necessarily bad.” Ugh.

While some people enjoy their studies a bit too much, we find this sentiment to be plain disturbing. I mean, who goes to college NOT to have sexual triumphs and embarrassments?! It’s a rite of passage. You get drunk, make out with hot people then wake up the next morning and feel shame, choosing to take a long shower scrubbing off said shame instead of studying.

Otherwise, what is the point of spring break, library cubicles, dorm rooms with sound proof doors and coed bathrooms?

Oh by the way, November 18th is “Have Sex With a Guy With A Mustache” day… just sayin’.